This is one Mean Old Lady!

This is one Mean Old Lady!
Self-portrait: 'Quilter on Fire'

Monday, March 18, 2013

A Cautionary Tale

Ah, if only there had been someone around to videotape me when I fell into Lake Conway on Friday. 

If lunch had been on time I wouldn't have gone outside and gotten myself into trouble.  (DHubby had told me he needed another half-hour to reach a stopping point with his work on the wine.  Far be it from me to interfere with wine production!  So I thought about a little chore that needed doing.)  

The good news:  there is nothing much hurt--a couple of bruises and what pride I had left.

It was like this:
     We had a big snag floating at the edge of the riprap—it’s been there a while, and with the low water level (sustained by the lake manager on purpose during winter when most of the rains fall) it wasn’t going anywhere. So, we found that the water level is finally UP—at least a foot or more higher than it had been, and I could see that the snag was floating. Just a judicious shove with a pole and I could propel it out into the little inlet and perhaps the wind-driven waves would move it on into the channel. Bye-bye!!!

It was hard to get it going, but I did manage to start the tree trunk toward deeper waterI got a good grip on my pole and started another heroic shove.  ....And the pole slipped, and my forward momentum proved impossible to stop...... and I went forward over the bank of riprap and into the water. 

Had it been even a week ago, I’d only have gotten wet to the knees and elbows, but with the water higher and the waves coming in……..  I went all the way in, falling first to my knees and then sprawling headlong….and then underwater briefly. I was quickly up and out—still had on my slip-on clogs and glasses, but minus my baseball cap, and carrying quite a bit of extra water weight, as it were.  Ignominious.

Slosh, slosh up the walk, shed the shoes, shed the gloves, slosh slosh to the door (quick look around, thankfully no fishermen, boaters, or neighbors) strip off most of the clothes onto the carport concrete, head into the house, drip drip, spot Don walking back to the wine room with his bottling equipment. 

“Don! I need some help!” Doesn’t hear, keeps going. So I go into the bathroom there (where he is putting his filter together,) and he sees me and says: “Good grief! Did you fall, Laura?” (Should mention here, in case you don't know our history, that our daughter has been substantially disabled since the age of 7 months.  Long story, but basically she's pretty unsteady on her best day.  If anyone falls down, usually it's Laura.  Kind of a natural mistake, if you are us.)
DHubby quickly corrected that to ‘Elaine’ and got out a towel and washcloth.
I finished disrobing, got in shower, cleaned up, went hunting for clean clothes. Plenty of odds and ends, but a dearth of undies. Note to self: restock at lake! Medicated the break in my skin where I hit an underwater rock (that riprap looks like granite—sharp edges) and got out hair dryer. Dressed, went out to load all the wet stuff in a big plastic bag, laid shoes, gloves out in sun, fished cap out of lake and added it to the array, then went inside into sunroom and sat down in a chair. Behaved rest of afternoon. The End. 

Mercifully, there are no photographs, YouTube videos, or other evidence...  except my arm is an interesting sight--so colorful!
Please direct sympathy cards to……


  1. I was going to write that you were lucky not to hit your head on a rock, and then I got to the end and your arm and grimaced. ’m glad to know the damage wasn’t more than that.

  2. I'm glad the Wordplay mystery was sort of cleared up. I looked, but I couldn't find any mention of it. Amazing.

  3. Instead of a funny tale it could have been tragic. I am glad you are well with only minor bruises to your body and ego.


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